Celebrate Recovery Choice 5

Hyunjin Lee
Nov 19, 2025
4 min read

The Transformation Choice

Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects.

Many of us have lived the cycle: You start a diet… and then fall off. You leave an unhealthy relationship… then drift into another one. You quit smoking… then pick it up again. You stay away from gambling… and then fall right back in.

We return to the old patterns we hate, not because we want to, but because our autopilot is still programmed for dysfunction.

Choice 5 is about deeply, sincerely cooperating with God as He reprograms the autopilot of your mind, behaviors, and emotional reactions. Jesus said,“Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires.”This includes change—His change, done His way. Before we can cooperate with God’s transforming work, we must understand where our defects come from and why they are hard to release.

1. Where Do Our Character Defects Come From?

a. Our Chromosomes (Nature)

From your parents, you inherited strengths—and weaknesses. Some of your struggles may have biological roots: temperament, emotional wiring, sensitivity, impulsivity.

But predisposition is not permission. You are still responsible for your choices and behavior.

Genetics may explain your tendency, but God’s power can change your trajectory.

b. Our Circumstances (Nurture)

How you were raised, what you saw, how love was expressed—or withheld—shaped you.

Many of today’s character defects began as survival strategies:

The need for respect → attention-seeking patterns
The need for love → superficial relationships or intimacy shortcuts
The need for security → materialism or control
The need for safety → shutting down emotionally

What once helped you survive may now be destroying your peace, recovery, or relationships.

c. Our Choices

You cannot rewrite your childhood—but by God’s power, you can rewrite your responses.

What you practice becomes habit, and what becomes habit eventually becomes your character.

Your chromosomes and circumstances influence you, but your choices define you.

2. Why Is It So Hard to Let Go of Character Defects?

a. Because We’ve Had Them So Long

They feel familiar—comfortable, even. Like an old pair of shoes full of holes but still our “go-to.”

Comfort can be more powerful than freedom.

b. Because We Confuse Our Defects With Our Identity

“That’s just the way I am.”No—that’s just the way you have been.

God sees who you can become.

c. Because Every Defect Has a Payoff

Every unhealthy behavior has a hidden benefit:

Temporary relief from pain
Avoidance of responsibility
The ability to blame something else
A coping method for guilt or shame

To let go of the defect means letting go of the payoff, too.

d. Because the Enemy Discourages Us

Satan whispers:“You can’t change.”“This won’t work.”“You’ll always be this way.”

He attacks your hope because your hope threatens his control.

3. How Do We Cooperate With God’s Change Process?

Real transformation begins in the mind. Your thoughts → create feelings → create actions.

To change your life, you must change your thinking—your internal autopilot.

Here’s how we cooperate with God:

a. Focus on Changing One Defect at a Time

You cannot fix everything at once—or God would never ask you to.

b. Focus on Victory One Day at a Time

Recovery is not microwaveable.

Some defects will require lifelong cooperation with God.

At the end of each day: Thank Him for even the smallest progress.

c. Focus on God’s Power, Not Your Willpower

New Year’s resolutions fail because we rely on ourselves.

Your willpower breaks. God’s power transforms.

Recovery begins when willpower ends.

d. Focus on the Good, Not the Bad

Your brain forms neural pathways: repeated thoughts sink deeper until they become automatic.

Negative thoughts → destructive pathways Scriptural truth → healing pathways

You can literally renew your mind through God’s Word.

e. Focus on Doing Good, Not Feeling Good

Feelings are unreliable. Obedience comes first; feelings follow.

Act loving → and eventually feel loving. Act healthy → and eventually feel healthy.

Sometimes “normal” feels uncomfortable at first because dysfunction felt normal for so long.

f. Focus on People Who Help, Not Hinder You

You need people who lift you, not pull you down.

“Two are better than one…if one falls, the other can help them up.”You were never meant to do recovery alone.

g. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection

A good parent doesn’t expect a seven-year-old to act seventeen.

God celebrates growth, not flawlessness.

Make the Choice

Action 1 — Pray About It

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. That’s how you face your character defects—one defect at a time.

Sample Prayer:

Dear God, thank You for Your forgiveness. I voluntarily submit to every change You want to make in my life. By Your grace, I am ready to face my character defects one by one. I have defects that have hurt me and defects that have hurt others. I have tried to fight them on my own and I have failed. I now ask for the power of Your Holy Spirit to transform my mind, my heart, and my actions. Show me where to begin. Help me identify the defect that is doing the most damage in my life. Give me courage to face it and humility to surrender it.I am ready to follow Your lead. Amen.